Stick up for your teammates, don't bully them

I don't write a lot about the National Football League, and I rarely write about football. It's not something I follow closely. I'm more likely to keep up with preps or college games, actually.

But with the recent stories in the NFL taking center stage, I wanted to weigh in on the situation involving the Miami Dolphins, Richie Incognito and Jonathan Martin. There's now an investigation into allegations that Incognito bullied his teammate Martin. Incognito has been suspended and Martin has left the team. Incognito allegedly left a voicemail for Martin where, in part, he said, "I'll kill you."

Oh, and by the way, other NFL players are defending this kind of behavior.

What happens in the locker room
I've heard that players are sticking up for the locker room culture, whatever that is. I've heard players criticize Martin for not being tough enough or not being able to be a man and stand up for himself. I've also read about how teams have all kinds of hazing that goes on. What is this, high school?

Now, there are probably lots of inside jokes or team initiations that can be qualified as pretty harmless. It's about bonding and building that team chemistry camaraderie within locker rooms across professional sports. For example, I know the Minnesota Twins bullpen has, or used to have, a Barbie backpack that rookies would carry out to the pen.

But bullying of teammates shouldn't be tolerated, like in the case of Incognito and Martin. Just saying "that's how locker rooms are" is no different than saying "kids will be kids" when talking about bullying in schools. An NFL teammate who uses the N word and threatens to kill you in a voicemail is crossing the line. There's no need for that.

Tough guys versus cavemen
I know NFL players want to come off as these major-league tough guys - just look at how they pound their chests like cavemen after making a big play during a game. However, being a tough guy isn't the same thing as being a bully.

There needs to be respect between teammates, whether you like them as people off the field or not. At least treat them with respect. Bullying someone, defending those actions and telling the victim to "be a man" are not examples of respect.

This one incident probably won't have a profound affect on the NFL as a whole. I don't think much will change. I guess I'd hope that if there are other bullying instances happening, it would be great to read stories about players stepping up to change that part of the culture for the better, or stick up for a teammate.

I've heard experts talk about how it might be tough for Martin to continue to play in the NFL, because players will view him differently or as being a guy who isn't strong enough to stand up for himself. I don't doubt that this is true, unfortunately, but I hope this doesn't turn out to be the case.